Candace Bushnell is a feministic genius! She’s written works such as Lipstick Jungle, The Carrie Diaries, Trading Up, and most notably Sex & The City.
Set in the 90s and early 2000s, SATC follows the lives of four, uniquely successful New York City women. You may be reading this wondering, what can I possibly have in common with Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha — Manhattan women who would now be in their 50s. Although the show is almost twenty years old, these characters still reign supreme. When watching the show, I oftentimes find myself relating to, and mirroring each of the four ladies.
With over seven years in, I’ve lost count of how many times we’ve broken up. Recently, what I have noticed is the heightened level of effort being brought to the table — from both of us. Before, we would go days, then weeks, and sometimes months without speaking after we had a fallout. Now, it seems like bae’s willing to swallow his pride, thus averting these long gaps of being out of touch.
The other night he asked me a question,
“Would you marry me?”
Laughing out of surprise and somewhat disbelief, I flipped the question, “Would you marry me?”
We are all perfectly imperfect. In some way or another, we do things to cover up or compensate for our shortcomings. Even if we are totally content with ourselves, some of us still have attention-seeking behavior.
Is this a bad thing?
I’d like to consider myself a feminist. Although not always easy, I’d rather uplift and empower my sistren, than use negativity to bring her down. Especially online.
Riddle me this, when you post a picture, what’s your purpose for doing so?
Praise & attention?
Or, do you do it because somehow snapping five pictures, then choosing the seemingly most flattering one to post on a social media app boosts your ego?
Many of the these “insta models” are indeed beautiful. I, too, enjoy taking certain in-the-moment photos, but I have to be much more vigilant about my online persona. So some pictures are left private.
One is Never Enough
At the beginning of one of our many restarts, bae would occasionally send me a picture. Before that, I never received a picture from him. I could tell that the flick was a screenshot from Snapchat, and I couldn’t help but wonder who else was fawning over the picture.
I would have been much more inclined to savor the moment if I knew that the picture was exclusively for me. As to not disrupt his complacency, I replied with a simple emoji and continued with my day.
Sharing is Caring
Don’t get me wrong, I oftentimes find inspiration from some of the photos and videos that I scroll through. There is so much untapped and underrated talent online! (cough)
I’m sure that some of these inspirations have strengthened both my inner-self and my relationships.
Yet, if I find myself spending more than 10 minutes enamored by my IG feed, I have no qualms about pressing the home button and returning to reality.
The surge of social media shows just how many fish there are in the sea. What I’ve learned is to love who loves you. Unconditionally.